Wednesday, March 31, 2010


3 must have been his favourite number. The 1st hint he gave me dat he is eager 2 see d world was at 3am. And he's born on the 3rd of March at 10.30am.

Now, after one year, I found the answer of living.... Him.

For Neyong, Ngian, Mama Hayyat, Mamit, Abua, Hasya, Nana, and BabyLa:

Ryyan now:

  • can say few words like bird, ball, mama, eddy, nenek, duck, mamam and No no no! (Sambil geleng kepala), there and pointing at somethg.... Others r just baby mumbling dat i will anwers "oh really?"

  • He got 2 teeth below n and 2 di atas n will curi2 bite u wen u suap him food just for d sake of it.

  • He loves music, pantang dgr music n he will move his body like ulat bulu or mr bean. He can sing old macdonald n Happy song

  • He will turn away fr me if he's gonna do smthg dat he knw wld make me angry... Konon2 so dat I x see... Like putting dirty stuff into his mouth

  • He's mastering his walking skill n controlling his momentum

  • Can follow simple instruction such as asking him 2 sayang/ kiss u, "come" as in follow u, "take", "yeep" (he'll lay down n pretend 2 sleep), he'll salam siap wit cium tangan lg, giving hi five, "open", "stand up", 'sit", "hands up" and "give"

  • He will put up his hand wen i say "ryyan pls baca doa"

  • He'll point to his nose wen u ask "where's nose?". Not really successful wit ear tho

  • Don't even try 2 say No or Don't and he'll do d exact opposite sambil smiling and looking at u, jst 2 temp u.... Cheeky, dats my boy!

Kesimpulannya, at this stage he's my own spongebob coz he can and will absorb anythg i teach him to do

Honestly, I never read those baby milestone stuff. I believe those thgs r 1 of d caused parents getting crazy n psychoed... Not dat I wanna b ignorant n x care abt my baby's development, but I wish to let them grow at their own pace la for god's sake.

Happy One year, Ryyan Esqandarsyah. May Allah bless you and protect you throughout your journey in life.

For all the wrong things I've done in my life, I've must have done something right to deserve u.

Monday, January 11, 2010


This picture is to remind me of my lowest point in my life... sigh, 2009 wasn't my year
Tis pic was taken during my 2nd operation, exactly 1 month after I had Ryyan. I don't wanna really blog abt d details coz it will open up d old wound. It is smthg dat I wanted to bury far far away at d bck of my mind.
Tis is d pic to remind me how I laid on d operation table starring at the lights n thinking wat will happen 2 my newborn baby if smthg goes wrong. Tis pic is to remind me all d test they did on me jst to figure out wat went wrong; x-ray, blood test, urine test, ultra sound, endoscopic, CT scan. Tis pic is to remind me how I celebrated my 30th bday wit catheter n urine bag still attached to me n I barely cld walk or stand properly. Tis pic reminded me how i cried every day and made my family cried too coz they couldn't stand seeing me almost losing it.
Why didn't I take legal action to d hospital and d doctor still remains a mystery. Somehow God gave me d highest feeling of redha dat I can ever imagine. I don't even feel angry at d doctor coz I'm sure it was never his intention 4 it 2 happen. U may think it is so stupid of me. Bt being forgiving heals u faster.
Y I still keep tis one piece of picture? Because it also reminded me dat no matter wat, family will always be there for u
and now, I have Ryyan
Therefore, I am blessed.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010


awwww... sweet!

entry coming soon

Thursday, September 10, 2009

The Slap in the Face

When life is so b*tchy and you find yourself just couldn't stop complaining and ranting....

Try to stop thinking about yourself and help other people n u'll stop whining.

Wen my chabie told me he wanted to do somethg nice for the anak-anak yatim from this unsponsored orphanage, I knew why n how important this is for him. So last Sunday we wen to blanja these adik-adik at BK Alamanda, joined by other sponsors as well.

We are not VIP. We don't have reporter coming to take our pic with the huge mock cheque. We don't have rakyat to impress or voters to pancing. A group of stranger just got together and organized this nice little event for Rumah Limpahan Kasih in Alamanda n help them buy stuffs to celebrate raya.

They are kids, let them enjoy n cherish raya... Like we did. You remember how happy we were during dat time, don't you?

Those who wish to support this orphanage may call this number:

03- 80618050
Dont' you think dat these adik-adik deserve assistance not only during Ramadhan and Raya?

Monday, August 31, 2009

The Second Chance in Life

"I've been contemplating..."

I know I want to but still contemplating for unknown reason. I haven't got the chance to get permission from my parents, nor my husband... maybe dats why. I mean I should, right? especially from my parents because they are the one who... made me(? hahaha). So if I wanna give myself (or some part of myself) away, I should seek their permission dulu kan...

Anyone already sign up? Maybe u can share your thoughts here....

A Gift of Life

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

The Day Ryyan Followed Me to Office

d jjjjkl jibbbnnnmjnimng bgnygv acav f mknlbb kkkk,,, hyggyuhuimyhhhh

Yeah.... mmmmm.... smart boy!

Monday, August 17, 2009

The Small Babe Who Made It Big

Like I told u guys million and million times before, Borneon chicks just rawk!!!!

For someone, from Mesia, got signed by BrushFire Records which is also owned by Jack Johnson, say no more... she's the epitome that INTERNET CAN SELL.

Those yang masih ketinggalan zaman may check her profile here.

ps: After few very malas entries, my next one is gonna be extra extra looooong and rajin.... so tarik la nafas panjang-panjang.....